Finding the Joys

I have learned over this past month that when I have to tell people about John who haven't heard, I feel bad; not for myself, but for putting them in such an awkward conversation.  In fact, just the other day I was talking to an airline agent asking for a refund on John's ticket and after I told her why I needed it, she replied, "Oh no, that's terrible!"  to which I laughed and said, "yeah."  Who laughs, right?!  I'm pretty sure it is just a way to ease the tension as I try to end the awkardness for others.  It surprises me though each time I do it and makes me smile just thinking about the weirdness of it.

I can see how God has helped make this entire event as easy as possible for me and my family.  There are so many different ways John could have died and so many other factors that we would have had to consider when it happened.  Looking back at the events in my life that have led up to this point I can see how God has prepared me as well as my family for this event.  He has been extremely good to us.  Realizing this has made it easier to look at all of the good things going on in my life right now and there is a lot.  Granted I am counting even the little blessings like getting extra whipped cream on my  mocha coconut frappacinos, but who doesn't like extra whipped cream?!  So, if I laugh to get out of an awkward conversation, I'll take it!